5

“Well, this week, China gave a vote of confidence in the U.S. dollar. Well, you know why? They own them all. Of course they’re confident.” — Jay Leno

4

“What is the point of having a royal family unless they are hideously out of touch. The queen is supposed to waste public money. The whole purpose of having a royal family is that they dress up in extravagant clothes and then rub our noses in our own miserable poverty.” — John Oliver on the royal family’s cost-cutting.

3

Cartoon: The US government sees the light

2

“President Obama announced the appointment of a new White House Budget director. Which is pretty surprising. You know the White House has a budget director? What has he been doing?” — Jay Leno

1

The Onion: Nation Demands Tax Dollars Only Be Wasted On Stuff That’s Awesome